Cutting Teeth (Spiritually Speaking) Part II

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"Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil."

–Hebrews 5:13,14 (NIV)

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In my last post, I shared how my current spiritual predicament has me exhibiting many of the same teething symptoms as my 6-month-old daughter.

As painful as it's been to face the dark, putrid recesses of my heart that have gone unattended for far too long, I can't help but feel overwhelmingly grateful.

I'm grateful for the loving discipline of my Heavenly Father, I'm grateful that I finally have a personal revelation of His grace, and I'm grateful that He is at work within me to sanctify me for His good purposes (see Hebrews 12:6, Romans 3:24, and Philippians 2:12-13).

I've found a lot of encouragement lately through studying the life of the Apostle Peter. While Peter certainly did a lot of incredible things in his lifetime, many of those deeds were actually incredibly foolish. I can relate to Peter—being led by the Spirit one moment and then getting dragged around by my sinful nature the next.

When you stop to think about it, it's amazing that Jesus chose to build His Church the "exemplar of the forgiven sinner," (Harrington, Daniel J. "Peter the Rock." America, August 18–25, 2008). That's good news for you and me. If Christ can see the potential hidden beneath the scruffy beard of an impetuous fisherman, He can certainly draw out our goodness as well.

In the Gospels, we walk with Peter through both his victories and his failures. Along the way Peter learns valuable lessons in humility, which serve to level-out his pride and solidify his shaky faith.

You might say that Peter has to endure the pain of teething before he can bite into the life of influence that awaits him. Well, you might not say that, but I might. In fact, I will. I'll share snippets from the life of Peter to support each point in this list of...

Cutting Teeth (Spiritually Speaking) Part I

My fussy little girl teething

My six-month-old likes to teethe on my hand while she wrestles herself to sleep. Last night, I was surprised to feel a little something sharp each time she bit down. When I rubbed my finger along her bottom gum, I was happy to discover—you guessed it—her first tooth, making it's way to the surface!

As thrilled as I am that her sweet smile will soon be filled with a set of chompers, I can't help but feel apprehensive about the teething journey ahead of us. I like to study-to-death whatever challenge is on the horizon, so naturally, I did some reading on the subject of teething last night.

I came across a bulleted list of teething symptoms, and thought that would be a good place to start (see article). It was all very familiar: irritability, biting behavior, sleep problems, etc. Midway through the list, however, a realization swept over me that caused me to pause. I read the list again from top to bottom. Then I read it a few times more, first with concern, then with laughter, and finally with some tears in the mix.

The symptoms were indeed familiar, strangely familiar. In fact, at 28-years-old, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that I'm cutting a new set of teeth—spiritually speaking, of course.

I'll go ahead and put it plainly so you can track with me through the metaphor. Lately in my Christian journey, I've sensed that God is calling me to deeper studies and challenging me to think and act with greater integrity. Just as my daughter will soon chew and swallow exciting new tastes and textures, I have this feeling that I'm approaching a new level of spiritual maturity, and that God is about to entrust me with some things I've longed for.

It's all very exciting. Along the way, however, the Author and Perfecter of my faith has brought to light several areas of immaturity that must be dealt with before I can sink my teeth into the good stuff that awaits me. It's as if, moment by moment, I can hear my Savior challenging me to deny myself, take up my cross, and follow Him (see Matthew 16:24).

"There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become  enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious." –Carl Gustav Jung

Just in case all of that sounds overly impressive and noble to you, I must say, there's not one thing dignified about it. It's heart-wrenching, mortifying, and agonizingly painful to face the deep-rooted issues that I've tried so hard to keep concealed. Now that the jig is up, I'm forced to take a hard, close look at the flaws that make me such a debtor to God's grace.

It's an ugly process, let me tell you.

Then again, if you've hung around me lately, I probably don't need to tell you. Like my teething little girl, I haven't been myself lately. I've been, as we say, a fussy pants. (I thought I'd use the term we use for our six-month-old, rather than any of the adjectives that might naturally come to mind when seeking to describe a grown woman who's unpleasant.) It's true. One minute I'm crying, the next I'm unduly defensive, the next I'm distant and distracted. Every once in a while I allow myself to loosen up and laugh, but those moments are usually followed by an inner struggle that sets me on edge again.

In case you're thinking that I've just described a particular phase of my feminine cycle, I've got news for you: this stuff has lasted for weeks on end. Yes, please do add my husband and coworkers to your prayer list.

So, where am I headed with all this? Well, getting back to that list of teething symptoms, I thought I'd base my next post on 3 tell-tale signs that you're cutting new teeth on a spiritual level. Although I'm still learning along the way, I'll share some thoughts on how you can journey to a new level of spiritual maturity victoriously, with both your sanity and close relationships still intact.

Closing thoughts to chew on...
Have you ever journeyed through a similar "dark night of the soul," as St. John of the Cross coined his experience back in the 16th century? Perhaps you're in that place right now. If so, I certainly feel for you, and I pray that you'll seek God's strength to embrace your cross and keep pressing on:

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"I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

–Philippians 3:10-14 (NIV)

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Why Words Matter

Husbands' responses on facebook. Click to zoom.

This was supposed to be a post on the subject of true beauty. I posed a question on facebook asking husbands to share their wives' top five most beautiful qualities. When the responses came in, I thought I'd compile the results and use them as a basis for my writing.

But there's been a change of plans.

Five husbands stepped up to the plate and offered a reply. As I read through their candid, heartfelt expressions (to the left), two questions came to mind, which subsequently changed the course of this blogpost:

1. Why didn't more men seize this opportunity to publicly dote on their wives? Maybe I didn't chose an ideal time of the day to post the question, but perhaps there was more to it than that.

2. What's unique about these five men and their marriages? They and their wives must be doing something right in order for these words of affirmation to come so freely.

While I'm not sure if I have answers to either of those questions, I do know that each of the five husbands have been married for several years, surely having gone through ups and downs and gaining wisdom along the way. So, we can't chalk up their kind words to dewy-eyed infatuation. Their words were rooted in true, time-tested love, and we can learn from them.

Or maybe they each gave in to some big spending on Black Friday and hoped the compliments would rack up some points toward their wives' good graces... but let's operate under the assumption that this wasn't the case.

I'm no counselor, and I've only been married for five years, but I'm a student of God's Word and I like to think that I've learned a thing or two through observing human behavior and reading some good books on marriage. Anyway, this is my blog and I get to post what I want on it. Take it or leave it, here's my two-cents on words of affirmation.

Drawing the Line

Bugs Bunny dares Yosemite Sam to cross the line

I spent a good chunk of my childhood planted in front of the television with Warner Brothers cartoons flashing before my eyes. (This might explain my fear of falling pianos and my inability to pronounce succotash without a lisp.)

Every once in a while a scene from one of these animated treasures floats to the surface of my memory and offers a valuable life lesson.

Seems unlikely, I know, but stick with me while I connect the dots.

The other day, I mentioned to a coworker that I wouldn't trust myself to sit alone in an office with unopened boxes of pies, as she had been doing all day. I have restraint issues when it comes to baked goods, so I have to draw some hard boundary lines in order to prevent myself from overindulging. (See my post on weight loss for more on that.)

That conversation got me thinking about boundaries and the danger of trusting ourselves, or our willpower, in other words.

In the clip above, poor Yosemite Sam gets duped when Bugs Bunny dares him to cross a line again and again until he eventually falls off a cliff.

Can you relate? I know I can.

Just like that cliff off in the distance, we can look at any of the seven deadly sins and think, "I'd never fall into that. You'd have to be an idiot to get tripped-up that badly."

But Satan knows just how to position us where he wants us. He draws a line and dares us to cross it. Then he draws another. We might follow with some trepidation at first, but if we keep going, our inhibitions diminish and even disappear as we continually defy the Holy Spirit's conviction.

We tell ourselves that we're in control of the situation even as we're in the midst of compromising, one wayward step at a time—until we fall.

Thankfully, Christ-followers can avoid the rabbit trail to destruction with much greater success than our pal Yosemite.

3 Keys to Overcoming Temptation

Put Up Your Dukes

Exodus 17:8-16 (NIV) The Amalekites came and attacked the Israelites at Rephidim. Moses said to Joshua, “Choose some of our men and go out to fight the Amalekites. Tomorrow I will stand on top of the hill with the staff of God in my hands.” So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning. When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword. Then the Lord said to Moses, “Write this on a scroll as something to be remembered...” Moses built an altar and called it The Lord is my Banner. He said, “Because hands were lifted up against the throne of the Lord, the Lord will be at war against the Amalekites from generation to generation.”		I'm going to be honest upfront so you can decide whether or not you'd like to keep reading. I don't have the energy to be witty or clever tonight. This blog post won't include a fuzzy story to keep things light, and it might not be very eloquent. Here's why: The enemy of my soul nearly knocked the wind out of me this week. I've had to wake up, stand up, and put up my dukes, spiritually speaking. Ever been there? If you have, you might understand why I felt the need to put everything on hold and have church tonight. You're welcome to join me, or if you've had enough already, you can go ahead and X-out of this window. I won't judge. I know those funny cat videos won't watch themselves. Still there? Cool. I hope this post is worth your while. Go ahead and read the passage to the left. You'll need that if you want to follow along. (It's about how Moses had to keep his hands raised while the Israelites fought the Amalekites.) This story of perseverance in the midst of battle has been running through my mind all day. The Spirit of God even brought a little 3-point message to heart, complete with a song list. Hope this has meaning for you as it does for me...

Put Up Your Dukes

3 Keys to Victory

Called Out of the Shrub

We celebrated a nap time breakthrough a few weeks ago. All on her own, Karen stuck her thumb in her mouth, rolled over, and conked out for a two-hour siesta.

If that doesn't seem like a big deal to you, you've probably never rocked a sleeping baby until your appendages went numb.

Over the next several days, Karen really got the hang of soothing herself to sleep. It wasn't until her doctor's appointment this past Friday that we encountered a hiccup in her new routine.

Karen received 5 different vaccines, which not only made her cry in the moment, but also left her with side-effects that made her extra cranky all weekend. Consequently, she was too restless to nap all on her own. She needed the extra reassurance of my arms in order to feel secure enough to rest.

As I rocked my little girl to sleep and did my best to comfort her, I began to think about how our loving Father comforts His children in the midst of trials.

At one time or another, we each find ourselves in circumstances that shake us to our core. Like the prophet Elijah in 1 Kings 19, we might long to run away and take cover under a shrub.

I know I've been there. The next time you find yourself in a dire situation, it may be helpful to reflect on how God lovingly met Elijah in the midst of his despair, and raised him up to fulfill his calling:

My Cat is a Parasite: Considering Give-and-Take

Don't get me wrong, our cat is cute and all. But if a parasite is an organism that harmfully feeds off another without giving anything in return, Miss Willow fits the bill. Well, almost. In exchange for all the time and money we spend on her upkeep, she's benevolent enough to offer a never ending supply of fur, dander, and feces.

This revelation regarding our freeloading fur-ball caused me to think back to a high school biology lesson on symbiosis. It occurred to me that it may be possible to categorize the important relationships in my life using the terms that scientists have coined for interspecies interactions.

Allow me to demonstrate:

3 Major Types of Symbiosis More Info »
MUTUALISM	Mutually beneficial relationship
Example: Karen and I. Caring for my daughter gives me joy. As she's cared-for, she continues to grow and defy the laws of cuteness.
COMMENSALISM	One organism benefits and the other is hardly affected
Example: My Neighbor and I. My next-door neighbor volunteers her time to manage the gardening in our development. I do nothing for her in return. Shucks, that makes me sound horrible... I did give her a tin of cookies at Christmas.
PARASITISM	One organism benefits and the other is harmed
Example: My Cat and I. She eats, poops, and vomits. I buy her food and clean up her mess. If leeches had fur and whiskers I guess we'd keep them as pets too.

Evaluating the give-and-take in our relationships can be a healthy exercise. As we consider our needs and the needs we help fulfill in others, we can weigh-out the areas where we may be off-balance. In the case of my neighbor, I'd like to get to know her better and figure out how I can be a blessing in her life. The store-bought cookies don't seem to cut it.

Here are a few types of relational unbalance that come to mind: