 |
| My fussy little girl teething |
As thrilled as I am that her sweet smile will soon be filled with a set of chompers, I can't help but feel apprehensive about the teething journey ahead of us. I like to study-to-death whatever challenge is on the horizon, so naturally, I did some reading on the subject of teething last night.
I came across a bulleted list of teething symptoms, and thought that would be a good place to start (see article). It was all very familiar: irritability, biting behavior, sleep problems, etc. Midway through the list, however, a realization swept over me that caused me to pause. I read the list again from top to bottom. Then I read it a few times more, first with concern, then with laughter, and finally with some tears in the mix.
The symptoms were indeed familiar, strangely familiar. In fact, at 28-years-old, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that I'm cutting a new set of teeth—spiritually speaking, of course.
I'll go ahead and put it plainly so you can track with me through the metaphor. Lately in my Christian journey, I've sensed that God is calling me to deeper studies and challenging me to think and act with greater integrity. Just as my daughter will soon chew and swallow exciting new tastes and textures, I have this feeling that I'm approaching a new level of spiritual maturity, and that God is about to entrust me with some things I've longed for.
It's all very exciting. Along the way, however, the Author and Perfecter of my faith has brought to light several areas of immaturity that must be dealt with before I can sink my teeth into the good stuff that awaits me. It's as if, moment by moment, I can hear my Savior challenging me to deny myself, take up my cross, and follow Him (see Matthew 16:24).
| "There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious." –Carl Gustav Jung |
It's an ugly process, let me tell you.
Then again, if you've hung around me lately, I probably don't need to tell you. Like my teething little girl, I haven't been myself lately. I've been, as we say, a fussy pants. (I thought I'd use the term we use for our six-month-old, rather than any of the adjectives that might naturally come to mind when seeking to describe a grown woman who's unpleasant.) It's true. One minute I'm crying, the next I'm unduly defensive, the next I'm distant and distracted. Every once in a while I allow myself to loosen up and laugh, but those moments are usually followed by an inner struggle that sets me on edge again.
In case you're thinking that I've just described a particular phase of my feminine cycle, I've got news for you: this stuff has lasted for weeks on end. Yes, please do add my husband and coworkers to your prayer list.
So, where am I headed with all this? Well, getting back to that list of teething symptoms, I thought I'd base my next post on 3 tell-tale signs that you're cutting new teeth on a spiritual level. Although I'm still learning along the way, I'll share some thoughts on how you can journey to a new level of spiritual maturity victoriously, with both your sanity and close relationships still intact.
Closing thoughts to chew on...
Have you ever journeyed through a similar "dark night of the soul," as St. John of the Cross coined his experience back in the 16th century? Perhaps you're in that place right now. If so, I certainly feel for you, and I pray that you'll seek God's strength to embrace your cross and keep pressing on:
"I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
–Philippians 3:10-14 (NIV)
