Fortissimo Jesus

My dad tells a story of a boyhood trumpet lesson in which he plopped down before his instructor, brought his instrument to his lips, and lazily pressed the valves through the first few measures of a piece.

It wasn't long before the instructor interrupted him, waving his hands in disapproval.

"Don't play, tha-tha-tha," he corrected, mimicking my father's apathy with a half-closed eyelid and a limp wrist in the air. "You must play, BA-BA-BA!"

The instructor pounded his fist against his palm with each BA. Then, in a swell of passion, plunged a pencil straight through my father's sheet music, tearing a hole in it.

My dad's wide eyes darted from the pencil sticking out of his music, to his instructor's flaring nostrils, and back to the dynamic marking in the first measure—fortissimo.

His heart began to race as he realized he'd better start playing like he meant it. He puffed his cheeks, raised his shoulders, and summoned all the breath his lungs to play with the enthusiasm that the piece called for. Finally, his instructor was pleased.

Rotten Roots

"You have not chosen Me, but I have chosen you and I have appointed you [I have planted you], that you might go and bear fruit and keep on bearing, and that your fruit may be lasting..."

–John 15:16 (AMP)

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Receiving our new nature in Christ is supposed to be a dazzling transformation, isn't it? It's like a quick change act—old stuff off, new stuff on, and bada bing—we're a new creation, right?

While I'm pretty sure I've heard it preached that way before, I'm not so convinced that's what Paul meant in his letter to the Ephesians (see verse). If you're like many of us on the sanctification journey, you've noticed that some old ways are just harder to shake than others.

Maybe your swearing habit ended immediately after coming to faith in Christ, but you still struggle with depression, or anger, or a phobia, or an eating disorder, or failed relationships, or an addiction, or another fill-in-the-blank clinging issue from the past.

Wouldn't it be great if the Christian bookstore carried a spiritual anti-static spray? Apply liberally from head to toe for lifelong relief from those pesky, clinging, old-nature garments. Sorry, either LifeWay is fresh out or they've got it tucked away in a vault somewhere and you need to whisper a codeword to access it. I tried "Jesus Fish," but the clerk just pointed me to a rack of bumper stickers and gummy bracelets. No dice.

So what's the deal with the stuff that won't come off? Get your gardening gloves and your floppy sun hat ready—it's time to head out to the orchard for an object lesson.

I wouldn't call myself a horticulturist by any means, but I've watched enough plants die to have learned this rule of green thumbs: If a plant is struggling, check for problems at the root.

When a skilled gardener notices a plant that's wilting or barely producing fruit, he doesn't simply fling fertilizer at it, spray some pesticides, and hope for the best. He takes a close look at it, uprooting it if he has to, in order to treat the problem at its source.

Depending on how long you've walked with Christ, you may have read books on the subject of your affliction, downloaded sermons, made positive confessions, attended seminars, and stood in prayer lines long enough to wear out your shoe inserts.

If you've done all that and still find yourself struggling, you may have been attempting to treat the fruit without examining the root. You might have a case of deep-down root rot that's going to keep causing problems until you're brave enough to dig it up.

What is Root Rot?

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In the gardening world, root rot occurs when soil becomes infected with a fungus, often due to overwatering. As roots loose oxygen in this stagnant setting, leaves and fruit gradually wither until the entire plant eventually decays (view source).

Let's think of our life-shaping experiences from birth up to the present as our underground root system. Above the ground, our leaves and fruit are our present contributions to the world around us, both good and bad (see Matthew 7:15-20).

Healthy Roots: These are positive, growth-promoting experiences from our past, such as: affirmation from parents, peers, and role-models; educational opportunities; spiritually formative experiences, etc.

Rotten Roots: These are negative—often shameful—experiences from our past, which may include: insults, neglect, trauma, introduction to perversion, and abuse in its many forms.

Spiritual Root Rot: Like the natural world, this spiritual condition occurs when rotten roots go untreated. After we come to faith in Christ, a beautiful network of healthy roots begins to take shape within, bringing forth fruit in our thoughts and actions, in our home life and professional life, and in our ministry. However, even with all this new life bursting forth, it's possible for sickly branches and sour fruit to hang on. Why? Because sanctification is a process.

Taking a Break from Blogging

Thank you to those who have been so supportive of this blog. I'm taking a break for some time. I hope to return to writing in a few months. Blessings to each of you.

Cutting Teeth (Spiritually Speaking) Part II

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"Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil."

–Hebrews 5:13,14 (NIV)

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In my last post, I shared how my current spiritual predicament has me exhibiting many of the same teething symptoms as my 6-month-old daughter.

As painful as it's been to face the dark, putrid recesses of my heart that have gone unattended for far too long, I can't help but feel overwhelmingly grateful.

I'm grateful for the loving discipline of my Heavenly Father, I'm grateful that I finally have a personal revelation of His grace, and I'm grateful that He is at work within me to sanctify me for His good purposes (see Hebrews 12:6, Romans 3:24, and Philippians 2:12-13).

I've found a lot of encouragement lately through studying the life of the Apostle Peter. While Peter certainly did a lot of incredible things in his lifetime, many of those deeds were actually incredibly foolish. I can relate to Peter—being led by the Spirit one moment and then getting dragged around by my sinful nature the next.

When you stop to think about it, it's amazing that Jesus chose to build His Church the "exemplar of the forgiven sinner," (Harrington, Daniel J. "Peter the Rock." America, August 18–25, 2008). That's good news for you and me. If Christ can see the potential hidden beneath the scruffy beard of an impetuous fisherman, He can certainly draw out our goodness as well.

In the Gospels, we walk with Peter through both his victories and his failures. Along the way Peter learns valuable lessons in humility, which serve to level-out his pride and solidify his shaky faith.

You might say that Peter has to endure the pain of teething before he can bite into the life of influence that awaits him. Well, you might not say that, but I might. In fact, I will. I'll share snippets from the life of Peter to support each point in this list of...

Cutting Teeth (Spiritually Speaking) Part I

My fussy little girl teething

My six-month-old likes to teethe on my hand while she wrestles herself to sleep. Last night, I was surprised to feel a little something sharp each time she bit down. When I rubbed my finger along her bottom gum, I was happy to discover—you guessed it—her first tooth, making it's way to the surface!

As thrilled as I am that her sweet smile will soon be filled with a set of chompers, I can't help but feel apprehensive about the teething journey ahead of us. I like to study-to-death whatever challenge is on the horizon, so naturally, I did some reading on the subject of teething last night.

I came across a bulleted list of teething symptoms, and thought that would be a good place to start (see article). It was all very familiar: irritability, biting behavior, sleep problems, etc. Midway through the list, however, a realization swept over me that caused me to pause. I read the list again from top to bottom. Then I read it a few times more, first with concern, then with laughter, and finally with some tears in the mix.

The symptoms were indeed familiar, strangely familiar. In fact, at 28-years-old, I can say with a fair amount of certainty that I'm cutting a new set of teeth—spiritually speaking, of course.

I'll go ahead and put it plainly so you can track with me through the metaphor. Lately in my Christian journey, I've sensed that God is calling me to deeper studies and challenging me to think and act with greater integrity. Just as my daughter will soon chew and swallow exciting new tastes and textures, I have this feeling that I'm approaching a new level of spiritual maturity, and that God is about to entrust me with some things I've longed for.

It's all very exciting. Along the way, however, the Author and Perfecter of my faith has brought to light several areas of immaturity that must be dealt with before I can sink my teeth into the good stuff that awaits me. It's as if, moment by moment, I can hear my Savior challenging me to deny myself, take up my cross, and follow Him (see Matthew 16:24).

"There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become  enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious." –Carl Gustav Jung

Just in case all of that sounds overly impressive and noble to you, I must say, there's not one thing dignified about it. It's heart-wrenching, mortifying, and agonizingly painful to face the deep-rooted issues that I've tried so hard to keep concealed. Now that the jig is up, I'm forced to take a hard, close look at the flaws that make me such a debtor to God's grace.

It's an ugly process, let me tell you.

Then again, if you've hung around me lately, I probably don't need to tell you. Like my teething little girl, I haven't been myself lately. I've been, as we say, a fussy pants. (I thought I'd use the term we use for our six-month-old, rather than any of the adjectives that might naturally come to mind when seeking to describe a grown woman who's unpleasant.) It's true. One minute I'm crying, the next I'm unduly defensive, the next I'm distant and distracted. Every once in a while I allow myself to loosen up and laugh, but those moments are usually followed by an inner struggle that sets me on edge again.

In case you're thinking that I've just described a particular phase of my feminine cycle, I've got news for you: this stuff has lasted for weeks on end. Yes, please do add my husband and coworkers to your prayer list.

So, where am I headed with all this? Well, getting back to that list of teething symptoms, I thought I'd base my next post on 3 tell-tale signs that you're cutting new teeth on a spiritual level. Although I'm still learning along the way, I'll share some thoughts on how you can journey to a new level of spiritual maturity victoriously, with both your sanity and close relationships still intact.

Closing thoughts to chew on...
Have you ever journeyed through a similar "dark night of the soul," as St. John of the Cross coined his experience back in the 16th century? Perhaps you're in that place right now. If so, I certainly feel for you, and I pray that you'll seek God's strength to embrace your cross and keep pressing on:

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"I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

–Philippians 3:10-14 (NIV)

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Why Words Matter

Husbands' responses on facebook. Click to zoom.

This was supposed to be a post on the subject of true beauty. I posed a question on facebook asking husbands to share their wives' top five most beautiful qualities. When the responses came in, I thought I'd compile the results and use them as a basis for my writing.

But there's been a change of plans.

Five husbands stepped up to the plate and offered a reply. As I read through their candid, heartfelt expressions (to the left), two questions came to mind, which subsequently changed the course of this blogpost:

1. Why didn't more men seize this opportunity to publicly dote on their wives? Maybe I didn't chose an ideal time of the day to post the question, but perhaps there was more to it than that.

2. What's unique about these five men and their marriages? They and their wives must be doing something right in order for these words of affirmation to come so freely.

While I'm not sure if I have answers to either of those questions, I do know that each of the five husbands have been married for several years, surely having gone through ups and downs and gaining wisdom along the way. So, we can't chalk up their kind words to dewy-eyed infatuation. Their words were rooted in true, time-tested love, and we can learn from them.

Or maybe they each gave in to some big spending on Black Friday and hoped the compliments would rack up some points toward their wives' good graces... but let's operate under the assumption that this wasn't the case.

I'm no counselor, and I've only been married for five years, but I'm a student of God's Word and I like to think that I've learned a thing or two through observing human behavior and reading some good books on marriage. Anyway, this is my blog and I get to post what I want on it. Take it or leave it, here's my two-cents on words of affirmation.

Drawing the Line

Bugs Bunny dares Yosemite Sam to cross the line

I spent a good chunk of my childhood planted in front of the television with Warner Brothers cartoons flashing before my eyes. (This might explain my fear of falling pianos and my inability to pronounce succotash without a lisp.)

Every once in a while a scene from one of these animated treasures floats to the surface of my memory and offers a valuable life lesson.

Seems unlikely, I know, but stick with me while I connect the dots.

The other day, I mentioned to a coworker that I wouldn't trust myself to sit alone in an office with unopened boxes of pies, as she had been doing all day. I have restraint issues when it comes to baked goods, so I have to draw some hard boundary lines in order to prevent myself from overindulging. (See my post on weight loss for more on that.)

That conversation got me thinking about boundaries and the danger of trusting ourselves, or our willpower, in other words.

In the clip above, poor Yosemite Sam gets duped when Bugs Bunny dares him to cross a line again and again until he eventually falls off a cliff.

Can you relate? I know I can.

Just like that cliff off in the distance, we can look at any of the seven deadly sins and think, "I'd never fall into that. You'd have to be an idiot to get tripped-up that badly."

But Satan knows just how to position us where he wants us. He draws a line and dares us to cross it. Then he draws another. We might follow with some trepidation at first, but if we keep going, our inhibitions diminish and even disappear as we continually defy the Holy Spirit's conviction.

We tell ourselves that we're in control of the situation even as we're in the midst of compromising, one wayward step at a time—until we fall.

Thankfully, Christ-followers can avoid the rabbit trail to destruction with much greater success than our pal Yosemite.

3 Keys to Overcoming Temptation